Kat Says: “Depeche Mode Changed My Life!”
Here’s an upload of my essay about Violator for Discogs, which has since been archived.
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Below, you’ll find a recreated version of an essay I wrote for Discogs back in 2020 about how important Depeche Mode’s Violator album was to my life. It was my first published essay from a first-person perspective, part of the peer-to-peer vinyl marketplace’s editorial section, although that wasn’t the usual take even for them.
As I explained in my last open newsletter, Violator was a pivotal album for me. This essay explores the album more intricately along with its cultural context in the greater scheme of ‘80s-’90s alt-pop and the group’s overall career—but it does open with that same moment going through my uncle’s record collection.
Further Reading: Kat Says: “Once A Goth, Always A Goth”
My Uncle Frankie passed away very suddenly in September of 2021. That moment changed my life, too, leading directly to my relocation back to my home county in South Florida. My Uncle was an incredible light of a human being. He made friends wherever he went, and his laugh will ring in my head for the rest of my life. I’m glad I got to share a piece of his impact on me with the world before he passed on.
I wrote this essay on a flight from Reno, NV., to Miami. It was my escape-COVID flight, hurrying from my mom’s place to a safe spot in Miramar where I could hunker down for the worst of lockdown. I was a lil wine drunk. What a weird time!
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Violator is still an album best listened to in the dark with headphones. It’s romantic and slightly sinister, amazingly sparse for a pop album, and cinematic in midnight tones. It’s obsessive and a bit vague, and it opened me up to a darker kind of sensuality, a welcome alternative to the gaudy sexuality of Britney Spears.
I’d never heard music so stark and arresting. Songs like “Sweetest Perfection” and “Waiting For The Night” were just on another level. My confused teenage heartfelt suddenly understood, like all the listless longing in my bones finally found expression. I could close my eyes and dance my drama or get lost in velvety moods. This noise was exactly what my insides felt like. I was no longer alone.
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